One thing to remember as our neighborhoods slowly become gentrified is that many people … how do I put this delicately? To heck with it. No matter whether you are of a high or low income bracket, no matter whether you're a mohawked punk grandmother or an immaculately coiffed young Republican, eventually you're going to need to make a trip to an adult boutique. You know, for stuff. Ahem.

Seattle has a few such boutiques scattered 'round and about. Perhaps the best known is Capitol Hill's Babeland (formerly Toys in Babeland). The shop is possessed of a sense of humor--its window displays often feature the shop's vast selection of massagers in whimsical situations, set up like bowling pins, for example. The vibe inside the shop is quiet and respectful, and never do you feel as if you should be hiding your face or swimming inside a large overcoat. Babeland makes shopping for sex toys almost as fun as utilizing them. It's practically the REI of the boudoir.

However, Babeland is not the only game in town. Other adult boutiques — Capitol Hill's SnM Underworld comes to mind — also have a comforting air, and now with the opening of Ballard's Wild at Heart, thousands of secretly kinky Fremonsters, Wallingfordians, Green Lakers and Ballardites who don't want to make the trek to Capitol Hill can enjoy an equal — and in some ways, even more relaxed — adult shopping experience.

Like Babeland, Wild at Heart is female-owned and operated, and staffed with friendly, discreet and supremely helpful employees. If you're the least bit unsure about how something works or where it goes, Wild at Heart's employees will talk you through your doubts and concerns. Unlike Babeland, the interior of Wild at Heart is shielded from wandering eyes by velvet curtains, and this seclusion is complemented by the shop's deep red walls and neo-Victorian appointments. In other words, it's just like sneaking into someone's bedroom, with all the giddiness that entails.

As for the stock, well, you're just going to have to check it out for yourself. Suffice to say that if you need anything from condoms to provocative clothing, you'll find it here. The video selection looks pretty vast (I'm entirely too shy to, um, actually peruse it), the shoe selection is rife with nightclubbing possibilities, and Wild at Heart's got massagers of varying size, shape and temperament.

So, as you settle into your new Ballard condo, ask yourself what's missing from your bedside table. The answer can't be found at Pottery Barn, though if you have found an answer to your bedroom questions there, you may want to write a book about it. The world must know.

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