Celebrate a city family every Tuesday: Today, meet the Meyers

After perservering through two years of infertility, Niki and Michael Meyers learned that they were expecting twins.

One of the twins, Madeleine, was born with Fibular Hemimelia, a combination of rare birth defects. She was born without a fibula bone in the lower leg, a bowed tibia and a deformed knee. As a result, Madeleine's foot was amputated at age 1, and she wears a lower limb prosthesis. Today, Madeleine and her brother Max are almost 2; the family lives in the Maple Leaf neighborhood. 
 
Niki, you're a special-education teacher for Seattle Public Schools. How did your professional experience affect your reaction to your daughter's diagnosis and eventual limb difference?

Niki: It's a lot different to be on the other side. You balance the fear that the experts are going to find something very wrong against the fear they will not find something.

People find my blog, and every other day someone writes to me about their child missing a limb. It's always devastating at first, but my advice to new parents is that it's not that big of a deal. It's hard not being able to see into the future, and imagine what life will be like. But kids are more resilient than we ever give them credit for.

Does Seattle do a good job of being ADA-compliant for children with a limb difference? Do you ever run into any challenges?

Niki: We're so lucky to have all these wading pools in Seattle, but sometimes we have a problem when Madeleine wants to really get in and get wet. I wonder, "Where do I put the leg?" I can't leave it out in the sun or it will melt. The inner liner of the prosthesis is molded with heat, so if it gets too hot, it will will get misshapen.

And then we have the stares. People aren't used to seeing children with prostheses. With shorts and skirts season coming up, kids are curious about it and some kids have a hard time with it. When we're out, we'll say "Oh, did you notice her helper leg?"

Is there some way you would recommend parents talk to their children about kids with prostheses?

Niki: Differences happen, some children are born without arms and hands and legs. Just say, "You have two hands and she has one, but she can do everything you can do."

We point out differences, because it's better for everybody to get those out in the open. I will say to kids, "Her prosthesis is like a boot, and she doesn't have a foot: She puts her leg into this leggie, or helper leg."

What sorts of resources did you have to prepare or cope with twins?

Niki: We took an "Expecting Multiples" class through the University of Washington. There are two local groups: North Seattle Families of Multiples and Eastside Moms of Multiples. But we found all the support we needed through meeting other couples in our UW class and through our PEPS twins newborn group. I relied on the lactation consultants at the Swedish hospital's lactation hotline and a feeding specialist at Children's Hospital, and was able to successfully breastfeed both. 
 
Where do you like to take the twins for dinner out? 

Niki: Tutta Bella is great for a huge family outing -- we like the pizza, and enjoy a bottle of wine. We go to The Ram at U-Village, they give the kids balloons, carrots sticks and ranch, and apples after dinner. At Atlas Foods, they have the best kids menu, with more of a grownup atmosphere. We sound like U-Village junkies!

And what do you like to do in Seattle with kids?

Niki: We take the Seattle Streetcar, go downtown and get coffee at Il Fornaio or Starbucks, then get on the Monorail to Seattle Center and play at the fountain. Something as simple as taking the streetcar or the Monorail is such a cool adventure for little kids.

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